I wrote this after our beautiful Oma passed away - Sep 2006 Dearest Oma I miss the way you called me your “Mellietjie”. I miss the way you used to rehang the washing I hung up for you when it was too hot for you. I miss they way you told your childhood stories. I miss your sugar bread. I miss how you said I’d get tummy ache if I ate the sugar bread if it was still too hot. I miss the way you used to bath. I miss the way you used to say Schwaebish rhymes. I miss how you loved going for walks. I miss how you made so many animal friends on those walks. I miss how you loved all animals, especially birds. I miss your knitted socks. I miss the way you fixed your stockings. I miss how you hated yodelling. I miss how you loved BZN and German folk music. I miss the way you looked over my shoulder when I cooked. I miss the advice you always gave so lovingly. I miss how neatly you folded the washing. I miss how you loved doing your German crosswords. I miss how superstitious you were. I miss how you called yourself a witch. I miss how you always said when Jamie stayed over: “Die wasgoed kry kleintjies!” I miss how you loved anything that smelled like lavender. I miss how you always had to change your outfit before we left to go out. I miss the way you handwashed certain things. I miss your food you cooked. I miss how you said always to make sure my socks and underwear were free from holes in case I was in an accident. I miss how you loved cats. I miss how you called all cats “Mietzies”. I miss how you left your back door open for me after midnight, so I could slip out. I miss how you loved wildlife programs. I miss how you once pinched Jamie’s cheeks and said: “Jy is the oulik!” I miss those overalls you used to wear. I miss your two wardrobes full of clothes that Opa had bought for you, but most of which you’d never even worn. I miss how you never wore make-up, only a little bit of lipstick (you were beautiful enough anyway!) I miss the way you used to interrupt us while watching a movie, but we could never interrupt you. I miss the way you dialled a phone number. I miss how you held the telephone away from your ear when saying goodbye. I miss how I went with you and mommy; travelling, staying in guesthouses and having cake and coffee. I miss how you loved caraway seeds. I miss how shy you were about your false teeth when someone walked in when you brushed your teeth. I miss how you shifted things back and forth on the breakfast table. I miss the way you put a spoon of chocolate in your filter coffee on a morning. I miss our breakfasts at your corner table with your famous filter coffee, the rye bread and German cold meats. I miss that awesome spaghetti you always made for me. I miss the faces you pulled when we gave you a sour sweet. I miss how you occasionally said ‘bullshit’ I miss how you lifted your arms when you were too warm. I miss how you always said: “Let me go”, when you were the one that was talking! I miss sleeping on your bedroom floor when I was scared. I miss how loud your snored! I miss how good you could whistle. I miss how you wiggled your bum when you danced. I miss you now pronounced ‘tequila’ and ‘strawberries’. I miss how you never wasted anything. I miss how you always repacked the dustbin to save space. I miss how you told me how you and Opa met and how he wouldn’t leave you alone. I miss how you never hated anyone. I miss the way everybody loved you. I miss how easy it was to love you. I miss how wise you were. I miss your silver hair. I miss your smiling eyes. I miss your soft skin. I miss your tiny feet. I miss your hands that held mine. I miss how you whispered in my ear and told me how incredibly proud you were of me for what I’ve achieved in my life. I miss your talking eyes when you were too ill to speak. I miss the expression on your face when you saw me for the first time in 2 years. I remember how sad you were and you couldn’t see me leave when I left for England. I remember how I picked you up when you were ill and you said you couldn’t believe how strong I was. I miss the way I slept next to you on my last night in South Africa. I’m sorry I didn’t sleep next to you every night. I’m sorry that there were times that I was angry with you. I’m sorry I didn’t remember the Schwaebish rhyme you said to me before I left. I remember the look you gave me the last time I looked at you. You told me to go, and it’s going to be ok because we’ll see each other again. You had tears in your eyes, but you were smiling. You were so beautiful, as I closed the door. I just hate the way I miss you. I hate the way we had to lose you. I hate that you had to have such pain. I hate that you had to go when you did. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I just miss you so, so much. I’m so happy we had the relationship we did, we were all so lucky to have someone like you in our lives. I’ve found a chorus in a song that explains just what I feel: “Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend, somewhere along the bitterness, and I would have stayed up with you all night, had I known how to save a life”. I’ve framed your picture so I can see your beautiful face every morning when I wake up. I’m so glad that you are always with me, whether it’s my chain, or your photo, or in my dreams. Thank you for everything. You’ll ALWAYS be loved and you are constantly thought of. Ich liebe Dich meine Oma! Deine kleindogter, Mellietjie xx PS. If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I would walk right up to heaven and bring you home again!